


Not in that Way

by mrssreid



Category: IT - Stephen King
Genre: Aged Up, Fluff, IT - Freeform, IT 2017 - Freeform, It (2017) - Freeform, M/M, Modern AU, One Shot, Reddie, Stenbrough, benverly - Freeform, richie tozier/eddie kaspbrak - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-11
Updated: 2017-11-11
Packaged: 2019-01-31 22:40:38
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,623
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12691653
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mrssreid/pseuds/mrssreid
Summary: Richie has a crush on one of the losers, and he thinks he will never love him back





	Not in that Way

**Author's Note:**

> hey this is my first time posting anything to ao3 so i hope it’s not too bad. tell me what you think!
> 
> modern AU  
> aged up to like 16
> 
> make sure to listen to “Not In That Way” by Sam Smith when the time comes. i think it really brings the story together!

     Richie was known for his impulsive actions. For his jokes that are not exactly appropriate for the situation he might be in. They even had a phrase to stop him from talking,

_(beep beep, Richie)_

which was used all too often. The losers knew that he did those things partially because of his undiagnosed ADHD, though. He had a hard time paying attention in class, he could never stay still, he always seemed to have five cups of coffee in the morning, which, sometimes, due to bad nights (that occurred way too often as well), was accurate.

     The only thing he seemed to be able to control was his feelings. That and his home life, which he wasn't able to conceal so well from the rest of the losers, yet they never really talked about it.

     He felt an attraction to one of the losers before they even knew what attraction was. Then he learned he was Bi, which, in a way, made things worse. Richie didn't tell anyone, except for Beverly, his second best friend. They had started telling each other everything just a few days after she had joined the losers club. The others had asked them one if they were together, and they quickly dismissed it, both saying they had feelings for other people. Queue the multiple questions, which they ignored. Mike had caught Richie off guard in band practice,

_(Richie, Beverly, and Mike were all in a band, cleverly named The Losers)_

not purposely, and he learned Richie as Bi, and had a crush on one of the losers.

     "It's kind of obvious, really," Mike had said. "Both of you are so oblivious." Richie had wondered what he meant by that, but Mike was the best at relationships in the group, so he didn't dwell on it long. Eddie really did have to be oblivious if he couldn't pick up on Richie's flirting.    

   

     At lunch, Richie prompted Bev with the idea of skipping class due to a rough night. She agreed, stating that she didn't have the best night either. She went back to talking with Ben, who was gushing over some poet he liked. Richie's gaze dropped to the pizza that had been plopped on his plate. His thoughts drifted to the previous night. He had gotten into an argument with his father, who had received and email from one of his teachers. It had been about how the teacher was noticing some attributes of ADHD.    

    _"What is this Richard?" Wentworth Tozier had demanded of his son._

_"It's nothing, dad," Richie responded._

_"You know that we don't have the money to get you tested. That's probably bull anyway, you're just misbehaving in class," Wentworth deadpanned._

_"Oh yeah, and that can't possibly be because of anything, right?" Richie responded sarcastically. The voice of Stan rang in his head immediately after he said those words;_ 'beep beep, Richie.'

_"What did you just say to me?" His father asked in a low voice._

_Richie exhaled out of his nose and bit his lip._ 'This'll bite me in the ass' _he thought before saying, "I said that it could be true! Or are your ears too clogged up to hear anything anymore? Jesus, it's been like you haven't even known I exist or care about me since-" he cut himself off. He looked his father in the eye and continued, "I lost her too, you know!"_    

     Richie was just glad that none of his ribs were broken.    

     Suddenly he was pulled out of his thoughts by someone shaking his shoulder. He looked up, and saw the others looking at him.    

     "You w-with us?" Bill asked, his eyebrows knitted together.

     "Yeah, yeah sorry. What were you saying?" He answers with a fake smile, clearing his throat after. He looks at them again, not quite noticing their surprised expressions.

     "They were making fun of me because my girlfriend. Bill asked you what you thought of her and me," Eddie filled in. Richie's smile wavers.

     "I'm happy for you, obviously. you're my best friend." Eddie, looking ever so slightly disappointed (although Richie of course didn't notice), opened his mouth to say something, but was cut off by the bell. All the losers stand up, and clean up their table. Richie throws away his uneaten pizza, which causes Mike and Bev to exchange knowing looks.    

     "C'mon Trashmouth," Beverly tugs on the sleeve of his tattered jean jacket, "Let's go to the music room." They head to said location while Mike and Eddie walk to science class.    

     The class was given the whole period to finish a lab report, giving Mike and Eddie (who were partners, and done) free time.    

     "Did Richie seem off to you durning lunch?" Eddie asks. Mike nods. He had always been terrible at keeping things from the losers, and he didn't want to tell Richie's secret, so he kept his mouth shut. "He's probably skipping class. I should check in with him."    

     "If he is, he'll be in the music room," Mike responds hesitantly.    

     Eddie asks to go to the bathroom, and heads to the music room.    

     "So what made your night so crappy, since we know about mine," Richie asks, plucking at random strings of his guitar.    

     "My dad," Bev sighs. "Accused me of all the rumors, again." Richie nods, familiar with the awful rumors that some girls in the school had spread. They sat in a comfortable silence,

_(meanwhile, Eddie was nearing the room)_

just listening to chords that Richie would strum.    

     "Got any cigarettes, Ginger?" Richie asks.    

     "None I'm afraid," Bev answers, but asks if

_(Eddie arrives at the door)_

she can make a suggestion. Richie nods, and she says, "Play me a song that resembles how you feel about Eddie."

_(Eddie stops moving)_

"And make it sad, since we're both sad."    

**[you should listen to the song now]**

     Richie thinks for a moment, but starts strumming his guitar. "And I hate to say I love him, when it's so hard for me."

_(Eddie's breath hitches)_

"And I hate to say I want him, when he makes it so clear he doesn't want me."

_(Eddie's mind drifts to the time that he was talking to Richie, and his girlfriend came up behind him and completely cut Richie off. He didn't notice then, but now he remembers how hurt his curly haired friend had looked.)_

"I'd never ask him cause deep down I'm certain I'd know what he'd say. He'd say I'm sorry, believe me, I love you, but not in that way."

_(A tear rolls down both Richie's and Eddie's cheeks.)_

"And I hate to say I need him. I'm so reliant, I'm so dependent, I'm such a fool."

_(Bev stops swirling around in the teacher's chair.)_

"When he's not there, I find myself singing the blues. Can't bear, can't face the truth."

_(Eddie's hands slowly start to shake.)_

"He will never know that feeling. He will never see through these eyes."

 _(_ 'If only he knew,' _Eddie thinks.)_

"I'd never ask him, cause deep down I'm certain I'd know what he'd say. He'd say, I'm sorry, believe me, I love you, but not in that way."

_(Now Richie's hands started to shake.)_

"He'd say I'm sorry, believe me, I love you, but not in that way."    

     It was quite for a few moments as Richie wiped away the tears that had fallen. He didn't like crying in front of people, but Beverly seemed to never care, and that made it safe in his eyes to cry in front of her.    

     "I sometimes forget that you really can sing, Richie Tozier," Bev says with a hint of a smile on her face. They both laugh softly, and go back to their comfy silence, with Richie strumming his guitar and Beverly spinning in the teacher's chair.    

     Things were not as calm with Eddie Kaspbrak. He could feel his lungs start to close up, and he knew that the others would hear him, so he quickly made his way to the bathroom, where he was supposed to be originally. His breathes became labored  as he struggled to take out his inhaler from his pocket. _'Where is it?!'_ He thinks. And then it dawned on him. He left it in his book bag.

     "I gotta pee, be right back," Richie says, placing down his guitar and standing up. He rolls his shoulders to relief some tension, and glances at Bev, who nods. He walks out of the room, and towards the bathroom. When he's close enough he hears a strange noise. He scrunches his eyebrows in confusion and walks in. His eyes drop to Eddie, who was sitting on the floor, and having an asthma attack. "Oh my god, Eds!" He rushes to the smaller boy's side, quickly taking out the spare inhaler that Eddie once left at his house, and he now carries everywhere. He brings it to Eddie's mouth and pulls the trigger, allowing Eddie to breathe. "Hey hey, you're okay, you're okay," Richie soothed. It took a few more minutes for Eddie to calm down completely, and when he did, he stood up from the floor, and rushed out of the bathroom.    

     "I have to get back to class," he spoke in a rushed tone.    

     "Eds!" Richie called, but Eddie was already halfway down the hall. "That was weird," he mumbles to himself.    

     Eddie makes it back to class, and quickly sits down. He blinks a couple of times to make his eyes not blurry anymore. He takes a couple deep breathes, and tugs his sleeves over his hands and starts folding and unfolding them. It was a coping technique that Bill had told him that his speech therapist had taught him.    

     "You okay?" Mike whispers, concerned. Mike knew all the loser's nervous ticks, including Richie's 50 annoying ones.    

     “Yeah, Yeah. Uh-Richie's fine, I think. He's, um, skipping with Bev," Eddie explains. _'Oh yeah, and Richie has feelings for me, just thought I'd mention that, because I'm totally fine can't you_ tell _?'_ Eddie thinks to himself.    

     "I hope he's still coming to movie night," Mike thinks out loud. Eddie nods, and pulls out a book that he was certainly too distracted to read, to signal he didn't want to talk anymore.    

     Once the bell rang, Eddie practically runs out of the classroom. He walks down the hallway, searching for the familiar blonde girl. He finally found her at her locker. He taps her on her shoulder.    

     "Hey Eddie," she greets, smiling.    

     "Uh, h-hi Susie. I need to talk to you," Eddie says, his eyes refusing to meet hers. Her smile fades. "I, um, how do i say this? I'm...I'm gay."    

     Her smile returns. "Yeah, I know. I've seen the way you look at that trashmouth, Richie Tozier."    

     "W-what?" Eddie exclaims.    

     "Look I'm not mad, I'm actually glad. There's this girl in my history class that is _really_ cute," Susie answers. "Go get your man, Eddie. Don't be afraid to tell him, and do it quick. You never know when someone will snatch him up."    

 

     Later that day, the losers were all at Bill's house for movie night. Bill was combing through DVD's he had. "C'mon g-guys! Horror or cuh-comedy?" Bill asks everyone.    

     "Horror!" Richie practically yells out. Everyone groans, but seem to agree. Bill picks up _the Ring_ and plops it into the DVD player. He presses play on the remote an goes back to his seat, next to Stan on the couch. The losers had set up a full on bunker of mattresses, blankets, and pillows. Stan, Bill, and Mike were on the couch, while Ben, Bev, Eddie, and Richie were on the two mattresses that were laid out on the floor.    

     "Are you kidding me, Billy, you picked this out of every fucking movie you have?" Stan complains. Bill shrugs and takes Stan's hand in his.    

     "I'll b-be here to p-p-protect you, Stan," Bill responds.    

     “Ha, that's gay," Richie jokes, earning a flick to the head from Stan.    

     "Beep beep, motherfucker," Stanley deadpans, causing the whole group to erupt with laughter.    

     As the movie starts, all the couples get closer (couples being Stan and Bill, and Bev and Ben), preparing to hug their partner or squeeze their hand when scared. Everything was going great, except for one thing. Richie hadn't even so much as talked to Eddie since they arrived at Bill's house. They always cuddled during movie night, no matter what they were watching. They didn't have to be together to do that; they were best friends. So there being a giant space between the two was _not_ sitting well with Eddie. But he ignored it the best he could.    

     Richie was still weirded out from what had happened at school. He always helped Eddie durning his asthma and panic attacks, and Richie would hug Eddie every time. But today, all that Eddie wanted to do was get away from him. Every time that Richie had looked at Eddie durning the movie, that would flash through his mind. Of course with his ADHD mind, he couldn't focus on the movie. Usually, while watching movies, he and Eddie would cuddle, and Eddie would let Richie play with his hair, or draw patters into his hand to preoccupy his mind. But tonight, Richie and Eddie hadn't even talked to each other. Richie rested his hand next to him

_(in the space between him and Eddie)_

so that he could softly tap his fingers so that we wouldn't annoy the rest of the group. He normally didn't really care if he annoyed them with his comments during movies, but he didn't want Eddie even more mad at him, so he tried his best to stay quiet, which of course enhanced his need to fidget.

     Eddie took note of Richie's hand. He found himself getting pissed at the fact that Richie wasn't holding his hand to help with his ADHD. That last straw for Eddie. He scooted close to Richie, closing that torturous space between the two boys. He didn't look at Richie, but asked the question that had been plaguing his mind for the past hour.

     "Why are you acting weird?"

     Richie scrunched his eyebrows together. "I don't know. Why did you act weird at school?"

     Eddie let air out of his nose, building up his courage. "Do...do you love me, Richie?" He couldn't' bear to look at Richie, much like he couldn't look at Susie. "I mean in _that_ way?"

     "Wha-" Richie started, but Eddie cuts him off.

     "Because I love you," he whispers, barely audible over the movie. He could feel his face burning. He never regretting saying anything as much as he did know. "I-I broke up with Susie," he whispered again, in the same tone. He started doing the sleeve tick, worrying about Richie's silence. Richie grabs his hands, stopping the nervous action.

     Eddie looked up at him in surprise. "I do," Richie whispers back in the same tone, which, until this moment, Eddie never thought was possible for him. Then he did something that neither the boys expected.

          _Richie Tozier kissed Eddie Kaspbrak._

     Eddie was almost too shocked to kiss back. But when he feel that Richie was about to pull away, he pulled his hand out of Richie's grasp and put in on his neck, pulling him in and kissing him back. They broke apart to the sound of cheering. Blushes rush over both the boys's faces, and the roll their eyes at the other losers.

     "F-fucking finally," Bill says, and they all erupt in laughter. Beverly hands both the boys small Polaroid pictures.

     "So that you'll always have it," she smiles at them. They both hug her.

It's safe to say that the boys cuddled for the rest of the movie.


End file.
